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What You See…
This photo was taken Friday or Saturday night before I went out. I applied a dark brown eyeshadow over my lid (to minimize the appearance of swelling), smudged an eye pencil across the top and bottom lash line, and added a couple of swipes of mascara. A well-placed highlighter and lip gloss revived my pale countenance and made me look a bit more alive.
What You Don’t See…
Behind the forced smile and bright eyes, I was beyond fatigued. I wasn’t in a flare or in a lot of pain but my body was just spent. What people didn’t realize is it took a lot more energy than the average able-bodied person, to complete simple tasks. By the end of the day, I was tired and ready for bed.
‘Cancel your plans,’ you say! Ah, if it were that simple. Occasionally, I have to show face at hangouts.
When a healthy person says they are too tired their friends might say “that’s okay! Next time!”
When an ill person says they’re too tired their friends ASSUME the person will bail the next time, and the invites stop.
I have to make an insane amount of effort to socialize. It sucks sometimes because I like being around people but it just takes energy I just don’t have!
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the Rite of Aging...early 